Phoenix Wright: Ace Hobo
by Bosslike Industries
Summary: Maya has been arrested and requests Phoenix as her defence despite the fact that he is now a Hobo.  Set after the events of Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney. Chapter 2 finally uploaded. Written by SP.
1. Chapter 1

It was a lovely summer's day in Los Angeles. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and a fifteen year old girl just pulled an AK-47 out of her underpants in broad daylight, but that's another story.

Phoenix Wright, ex- Lawyer and Ace Hobo was sprawled on the sofa in the Wright Anything Talent Agency in a deeply uncomfortable position, surrounded by several empty bottles of Grape Juice, 500 empty packets of Snackoos and a tin of Golden Syrup. He was in the middle of a dream about fangirls being killed by the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, when the phone started to ring, waking him and causing him to fall off the sofa and bang his head off the coffee table.  
>"Ouch!" he squealed, like a Yaoi- Obsessed Fangirl after being denied access to her fanfiction account as the image of Johnny Yong Bosch shoving a fangirl's lardy acne-encrusted face into a meat grinder disappeared from his head.<br>" 'Pollo, Trucy, could one of y'answer th'phone?" he yelled, his speech slurred as a result of the Grape Juice Binge the previous night.(Long Story)  
>"No! I'm too busy writing in my Delicious Journal!" Apollo yelled back. "Its your phone, you answer it!"Just then, Trucy barged in with a shopping bag full of bricks of Lard and scuba diving kit.(Don't Ask)<br>"It's okay, I got it!" She lobbed the bag in the general direction of the corner where it missed, bounced off the wall, and laded on Apollo, making him drop his diary and causing him to cry like a girl.  
>"Wright Anything Talent Agency, Trucy Wright speaking, how can I help you?" she chirped cheerfully. Phoenix started snoring despite the fact he was face down under a poorly designed Coffee Table that looked like it was stolen from a Charity Shop. Apollo was still crying.<br>"That noise? That's just Daddy, he's asleep. Oh, the other one that sounds like a girl? That's Apollo, he's just crying because he dropped his Diary, its a pink one with kitties on it!"  
>"I'M NOT A GIRL!" Apollo screamed, Objection Pointing in Trucy's direction.<br>"Shut up, No not you, Apollo, he's whining again." Trucy continued.  
>"Anyway,how can I help you? You need a Lawyer? That's no problem, will you take Apollo Justice? Yes that is the one that sounds like a girl."<br>"I'M NOT A GIRL!"  
>Trucy ignored him.<br>"No? Hold on, WHAT?" Trucy dropped the phone.  
>"What's wrong?" Apollo asked, "Did you get accused of nicking things by shoving them down your knickers again?"<br>"No." Trucy said sadly. "It's not that."  
>"Then what is it?"<br>"Its Maya Fey." Trucy replied mournfully. "She's been arrested and she wants Daddy to defend her."


	2. Chapter 2

"Well that's inconvienient." Apollo commented. "Anyway, who is Maya Fey?"

"Maya is one of Daddy's BFFs from his Lawyer Days, y'know, befoe he took up his hobby of getting sloshed and vomiting into kebabs." Trucy replied.

"Well, that explains the awful smell of vomity chilli sauce in here. Anyway, we better get over to the Detention Center and see what's going on. You wake Mr Wright and I'll get The Apollomobile* started!" Apollo said, running towards the front door, which was convieniently still open.

"MIND THE LARD!" Trucy yelled.

Too late. In his haste, Apollo tripped over the Scuba kit, skidded on the lard and sailed out the door in a weird cacophony of girlish screaming and rude sweary words that would upset your Granny until he collided with The Apollomobile. Trucy started laughing hysterically.

"YOU'RE AN EVIL GIRL AND I HOPE YOU GET BEATEN UP BY A TELETUBBY!" Apollo screamed.

"Could you do that again?" Trucy chortled.

Apollo punched her, Hard.

Several Speeding tickets and a trip to A&E later, Apollo and Co. eventually arrived at the Detention Center where they were directed into an interview room where a black haired woman who looked like she was in her mid 20's was playing with a Ben 10 action figure.

"Sorry we're late" Apollo apologised."We would have been here sooner if Trucy didn't make me stop for McDonald's."

"They were giving away Junior Car Thief Kits free with their Happy Meals!" Trucy pouted. "you know I've always wanted to have a go at nicking a car!"

"TRUCY! WE'RE IN A DETENTION CENTER! DO YOU WANT TO GET ARRESTED?" Apollo roared at her. Phoenix was slumped in the corner snoring ,with a lampshade wedged on his head.(?)

"That's all very well and intresting Apollo, but are'nt we here for a reason?" Trucy replied coolly.

"LOOK YOU MORONS! I DON'T CARE SO LONG AS I GET THE HECK OUT OF THIS DUMP! I'M MISSING THE STEEL SAMURAI!"

Apollo and Trucy nearly wet themselves. Phoenix was drooling. Maya was standing on a desk in the middle of the room, waving her action figure in the air wildly.

"Tell Nick to get off his flabbly buttocks and do some Defending already!" she screamed.

"Umm... I presume you're Maya Fey?" Apollo queried from his hiding place behind Trucy.

"Hey! That's Master of Kurain to you!" she Objection Pointed.

"Hey! only Lawyers and Prosecutors can Objection Point!" Apollo glared.

"EVERYONE SHUT UP OR I'LL KICK YOU OUT!" screamed a voice in the corner. It was The Security Guard Who Stands In The Background And Does Nothing.

"You shut up!" Trucy squealed. "You're not even a main character!"

The guard burst into tears, "You sound just like my Mother in Law!" he cried.

"Oh Shut Up."

* A battered red Mini covered in scratches an rude graffiti that Trucy nicked from a skip behind the Gatewater Hotel. Or a charity shop. She was probably underage drinking at the time. I dunno.


End file.
